Romancing The Stone

Romancing The Stone – Joan is a successful romance author but whose life is samey and empty. When she is contacted by her sister, who has been kidnapped in Columbia, she has to race over with a mysterious map that has come into her possession. But whilst there things don’t go according to plan and she has to rely on selfish American rogue, Jack. to guide her to safety. But will he fulfil his end of the deal? And what does the map lead to?

Romancing The Stone (1984) – Director: Robert Zemeckis

https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=7597974

Rating: PG

Running Length: 106 mins

Starring: Kathleen Turner, Michael Douglas, Danny DeVito

Genre: Action / Adventure

REVIEW: ‘ROMANCING THE STONE’

‘Romancing The Stone’ was the first big hit from Robert Zemeckis (who went on to direct ‘Back To The Future’ and ‘Forest Gump’) and was a the breakout success for Kathleen Turner. Swinging very much from the ‘Indiana Jones’ meets ‘Goonies’ style of movie for which the 80s was particularly prevalent, there is a lot of rough around the edges charm here.

Both Turner and Douglas get the classic ‘mousey woman who finds her confidence’ and ‘rogue-ish man who softens over time’ dynamic down pat and it is their scenes together that make the movie sparkle. Despite some reliable quality from Danny DeVito, the scenes without the leading pair are often arbitrary and exercises in exposition rather than effective side plot. Also, on the negative side, the movie hasn’t aged all that well in terms of PC behaviour (we suspect the Columbian tourist board won’t be best pleased with the depiction of their country here!).

Despite cursing the air bluer than a sailor with a crushed foot (albeit with a ‘moderate’ selection of words), ‘Romancing The Stone’ is the kinds of swashbuckling adventure movie that we don’t seem to have recaptured since the 80s. Action! Romance! Comedy! Mud slides and gun fights and rainforests and outsider hating villagers and kidnapping! Yes, it may be showing it’s age, but the overall sense of fun still shines through and with a great chemistry between Turner and Douglas you can let them carry the film into your own forest of enjoyment.

CONTENT: IS ‘ROMANCING THE STONE’ SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN?

The movie opens with a narrated western style scene showing a woman in danger. The woman’s body is wet and she is wearing a white top that is very see through. There is a close-up shot of her covered breasts although dark nipple is visible beneath as she lowers a shoulder strap. A man threatens her and says ‘take them off’. However she pulls a knife from a leg holster and throws it at him, where it embeds in his body. The narration says “That was the end of Grogen, the man who killed my father, raped and murdered my sister, burned my ranch, shot my dog, and stole my bible.” It’s quickly revealed that this is a scene from a romance novel being narrated by the author – Joan.

During a conversation between Joan and her editor she is told to never get into an elevator alone due to ‘rapists’.

A maintenance man in Joan’s apartment building is stabbed. This happens once and there is no injury detail but the man is killed.

A woman flees attackers but a child throws some bolas at her which hit her around the face and knock her out,

Joan’s flat is burgled and as she investigates there is a jump scare with a cat. She receives a call and is told that the woman being held is afraid that, “…they’ll cut me. They’ll hurt me.”

Joan and Jack both fall and slide down a muddy embarkment. He lands face first in her crotch.

When one characters talks about career in medicine says, “I could have been a cosmetic surgeon. $500 thousand a year to be up my neck in tits and ass.”

Jack leer’s over Joan’s legs when she isn’t looking. A skull with sunglasses is found as loud lightning booms making Joan scream. When Joan and Jack are taking refuge in a crashed aircraft they discover some marijuana. Jack prepares some joints and is surprised when Joan wants one. “Oh, you smoke it?” he says, to which she replies, “I went to college.” They burn it for a campfire and inhale deeply. Joan later says she is feeing giddy. Jack lunges forward and chops the head off a snake with his machete.

A male and female character are both naked in bed. He is lying on top her whilst they talk. His body mostly covers up hers but the side of her breast is visible. As the scene ends they kiss and he runs his hands down her side. The scene cuts but it is clear that they are about to be intimate.

A woman cuts her hand with a knife in order to drip blood and distract crocodiles. We don’t see the injury detail but we do see the blood drip down. A man is hit hard in the crotch with the butt of a gun. The crocodile then bites a man’s hand off. We see the resulting stump and some loose tendons. There is a very brief shot of him kneeling with blood pumping from the injury. A background character is shot. A threatening man says to a woman, “How will you die? Slow, like a snail, or fast, like a shooting star?” The scene culminates with a man being set on fire and falling into the crocodile pit

CAN I SEE A CLIP?

VERDICT: IS ‘ROMANCING THE STONE’ FOR KIDS?

‘Romancing The Stone’ is a typical PG movie of the early 80s the likes of which you don’t get anymore. In today’s market it would have been a 12A / PG-13 but it also hits that sweet spot between action and adventure that is often lacking in modern efforts. But due to the large amount of bad language and the infrequent sexual content we would recommend this movie as suitable for age 10 and above.

• Violence: 3/5 (not much injury detail until the final action scene with the crocodile)
• Emotional Distress: 2/5 (hostage situations)
• Fear Factor: 2/5 (various threatening characters. Joan spends the first half of the film being often afraid)
• Sexual Content: 3/5 (a brief shot of a Playboy cover.)
• Bad Language: 5/5 (Whilst none of the stronger swear words are used, there is frequent moderate cursing throughout. One character describes a building as “some kind of spik-o military compound”)
• Dialogue: 3/5 (someone asks if they have found a woman’s husband yet to which the response is, “Just the one piece.”
• Other Notes: Deals with themes of theft, kidnapping, extortion, looking for adventure, opposites attract, drugs to relax, looking out for family, and getting out of your routine.

Words by Mike Record

[amazon_link asins=’B01I5SFKPI,B00005KK3M,B00CIXD5XG,151073547X,B00I954D42′ template=’ProductCarousel’ store=’isthimovsui-21′ marketplace=’UK’ link_id=’acfd79ee-a6be-11e8-8548-15812ac77e5f’]